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How can we maintain a long-term relationship with the people around you?

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First of all, lets analyze what causes a long-term or short-term relationship. Short-term relationship sours with the demands to each other. Once demand accumulates, the inner balance is disrupted. When this disruption builds up beyond ones limits, the following irresponsibility, resentment and accusation will lead to the breakdown of such a relationship. These problems are particularly common between couples, among family members and friends. In contrast, a long-term relationship is dependent on mutual support, understanding and assistance. It is the law of cause and effect that drives a relationship into different results. We can always make the right choice if we are clear about the line between what we should and should not do.

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The ancient wise ones have not only provided a reference to what we should and what we shouldnt do, but also treated others mistakes with pleasure. Where does the pleasure come from? The wise ones made the mistakes of others as opportunities of Dharma-practising, which could benefit themselves and help others by setting them free from these mistakes.

　　For example, when others demand or accuse us, we appreciate because we can immediately recognize that such actions are source of sufferings and are what we shouldnt do. So we can avoid such mistakes, which serves as our motivation to genuinely support rather than harm them, such as speaking softly instead of harshly, being compassionate instead of detrimental, or finding the right timing to give better suggestions etc. Whatever the supporting methods we use, we will gain a long-term beneficial relationship through the mistakes of others.

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In contrast, demands, accusations, scolding, harm and harsh words will lead to a short-term relationship. People might passively accept our aggression temporarily. If we think we are always right and use our rightness as an excuse to demand and accuse others, the others may not afford the accumulations with the time, our relationship will break up easily.

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2018report an error Robin beijing

quanzhou | flying friends

Original Title：Light of Life Sunshine Breakfast | To Maintain a Long-Term Relationship

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